The 2016-adventure

Your wake-up call for the rest of 2016

I invite you to join me for the second part of the year. We are on an adventure where we stop operating on autopilot and start living a life of curiosity and joy.

The new fun activities are:

• WEEK ONE

Whether I drink tea or coffee I want to make it a ritual: I want to be aware of the smell, the taste, the temperature and even where it comes from and what it took for me to be able to enjoy it. Savouring the moment and realising when my mind has wandered.

• WEEK TWO

How will it feel to reduce the speed of my movements, for brief periods in the day?

• WEEK THREE

I want to play with visualisation from time to time. I am going to imagine the sun’s warm and bright rays shining down into my body. I want to feel it filling my body from the toes upwards as if it was a container. As the “liquid sunlight fills me up” I sense all tension melting away in my body.

• WEEK FOUR

When I brush my teeth, I want to make it an exercise in mindfulness. Rather than simply thinking about stuff, direct my attention to the physical sensations, the smells and the taste.

Contact Lucia Brand
0827824747

Our 2016-journey continues...

The new experiments for the following period are:

• WEEK ONE I want to play some music and dance.

• WEEK TWO I want to sense stillness and stability in my body.

• WEEK THREE I want to engage in small acts of kindness.

• WEEK FOUR I want to take a moment before going to bed to appreciate something good which has happened during the day.

In life, there is always movement - things don’t stay the same - change is inevitable! Change happens in your internal and external world.

The question is how do you go with the flow? (Sometimes your fixed ideas about yourself or a situation or another person’s behaviour leave no room for this flow to happen...)

Jon Kabat-Zinn says awareness is befriending ourselves and our experience.

He points out that awareness or mindfulness is transformative and healing. It doesn’t take the suffering away, but it gives it a bigger basket to tenderly hold and know our pain and that, it turns out, brings healing. Healing is coming to terms with things as they are.

Sometimes, we get mistreated and stripped of our dignity. Other times, loneliness is just loneliness and shame is just shame and pain is just part of being alive.

Either way, the good news is, generally, wounds heal.

-       It is universal. Realising that what you sense in your body or your emotion is experienced by million others at THIS moment (Our circumstances are different, but what we feel, is the same – the fact that you are NOT alone makes it softer and more bearable, doesn’t it?).  

-       Physical sensations in your body constantly change. When you follow your sensations, you see this! You realise that a pain here or there has a lifespan of its own. It is there now, but later it is gone. This makes it possible for you not to identify so strongly with your beliefs about it (What you think or feel aren’t equal to who you are). This makes the mind so much lighter. It is so easy to notice the beginning of an unpleasant emotion, but rarely do you notice the end! Your perspective on life is likely to be less distorted when you also acknowledge the end of difficult emotions. You take note of moments of happiness or calmness, as well. Nothing is fixed forever and you realise that you are not a certain kind of person like, “I am an anxious person” or “I am a happy person”. We tend to limit ourselves and others in that way that we tend to think one dimensionally. We tend to label ourselves and mostly in a negative way. Instead, we want to allow a range of possibilities and the freedom to change. 

It isn’t about thinking about change or looking for change, but allowing change to happen in spite of uncertainty that we experience.

Keeping it light and being curious about what is about to unfold opens ‘more room to move’. You don’t force things to happen because that prevents change. When thoughts or feelings are unsettling you might want it to be different; causing resistance, you hold things in place and don’t allow life to flow; instead you want to provide the conditions for change to happen. You are resting in the uncertainty of one moment unfolding at a time (during your mindfulness exercise) and not knowing, anticipating or expecting what to come next. You have to step back and not control it, but acknowledge that it has its own pace and time and being kind and patient with yourself.

Non-judgemental paying attention is a key factor in this regard. It is to witness a sensation, a feeling or a thought in the moment in everyday life (and when it changed or when it came to an end). It is very normal to notice how much you are judging. Letting it ‘rain down’ in this moment... instead of it having to be one way or another.

The messiness of everyday life, like being in conflict with your teenager becomes the teacher of the moment. In order to respond differently than before, you don’t attach to how it ‘should be’/ ‘doing it my way’. Instead, you allow/create the space to see more than your previous beliefs. This moment is all you have to make a difference. If you are breathing, there is more right with you than wrong with you.

There is more freedom in your mind and room to ENJOY your life! Your life really matters, now.



The Attitudes of Mindfulness

Beginners' mind
Acceptance
Trust
Patience
Non-judging
Non-striving
Gratitude and generosity
Letting go

Our adventure continues...

Breaking our habits is a journey. 

We long certainty in our careers, relationships, in health and in life. Instead, there is uncertainty.

We are able to control or influence just a few of these - from our side!

Instead of being concerned about things we can’t control, let us wake up to this moment. Let us befriend uncertainty. Let us change certainty into curiosity – genuine interest, like watching an exciting movie - and stop operating on autopilot!

                                                                                                    Photo Credit: Unsplash

Keep in mind that this journey is about repeating the same activity during the whole week. This might seem boring, but we do it to train the mind in being mindful. The goal is not to achieve anything, but to build a strong foundation. It gives you the sense of more space in your mind and confidence in your life.

By not achieving anything, I mean not getting rid of an unwanted emotion like an unpleasant emotion, but having a different relationship with it. Regarding that emotion, instead reflect for a moment, how would you relate to a friend? You probably would be doing it without thinking I want to achieve something. It is like that!

The new activities for the following weeks are:

• WEEK ONE I want to pay attention to the sensation of (the temperature of) the water when I shower or take a bath.

• WEEK TWO I want to read or watch something funny, daily.

• WEEK THREE I want to pay attention to my physical sensations when I am going to change my posture - for example when I am sitting down or standing up – at least 5 times each day.

• WEEK FOUR I want to live mindfully and with intent - to be clear what I am going to do next. To be present with that activity I am doing. Simply being aware of my feet when I am walking for example and not changing the way I do it. I am permitting thoughts or feelings to arise, and (gently...) noting them and then simply being present to what I am doing.

Watch the Headspace animation to understand how a sense of more space is created in the mind. 

Why should I do mindfulness training? 

It leads to peace of mind and wellbeing, greater focus and creativity and better relationships. Achieving a lot by not trying to, isn’t it?

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What is the Complete Study Course?

 

The Course is meant to give you or your children practical insight on how to learn more effectively and with less frustration. The lessons in this course can help in learning many different subjects and skills. Whether you love language or math, music or physics or history, you will have a lot of fun, and learn a LOT about how to study!

It is provided to students at school or university level.

Contact Details

Lucia Brand
082 782 4747
luciabrand@cybersmart.co.za

Our 2016 adventure

Welcome back to our 2016 adventure!

 

I have taken a kind of detour with ‘interesting times’ as the ancient Chinese quote goes. I was hospitalised and had an operation and the opportunity to see what is really important in life. Surrounded and supported by loving friends and family it became quite clear. Mindfulness and relationships! Especially those with the people you connect to around you in the moment.

The journey of our 2016 adventure is on how to break our habits. Let us change certainty into curiosity and stop operating on autopilot!

You may join us today by submitting your email address to receive my posts via email if you have not done so already!

This month our experiments are concerned with the wonder of the other.

There are many reasons why you would want to ‘wake up’ in your relationships. Feel free to share any of the comments about your journey by clicking on ‘No comments:’ below or by sending me an email.

Let us change certainty into curiosity, knowing into asking and accusations into questions. Let us stop telling and start listening and trade our biting words for biting our tongues.

You might think you have certainty about who your partner is or who your parent or who your child is. And you may be absolutely certain why they are doing or not doing what they do, like for instance, “(Name) is disorganised and irresponsible (by, for example, not studying)” or “He/She doesn’t care about me”.

Gewoonlik, dink ons die woorde: “Dit voel of ek nie meer deurkom na jou toe nie” beteken die einde van die verhouding. Maar wat as dit beteken dat die verhouding dan uiteindelik kan begin?

Dis juis wanneer ek uitreik na ander in plaas daarvan om op myself fokus wat dinge vlotter verloop. Wanneer ek dit byvoorbeeld my doelstelling maak om die verhoudings met my spesifieke naaste te verbeter (en dit beteken neutraal luister sonder oordeel!).

Bowendien is daar ’n heelal opgesluit binne die persoon wat ek liefhet.  Op die meeste, ken ek die klein stukkie wat ek ‘bewoon’, maar daar is nog lande, oseane, hemele en uitspansels wat ek nie ontgin het nie. 

Daar is misterie binne elkeen waarmee ek saamlewe!

Hulle is dinamies, groeiend, ontwikkelend en daarom kan die dinge waaroor ek so seker is, verander.

Of dit kan ook wees dat dit waarvan ek oortuig is, ’n projeksie is van my eie vrese, onsekerhede, vertwyfeling of eensaamheid...

I provide you with the new activities for the following weeks:

• WEEK ONE, rather than jumping out of bed I want to pause long enough for 3 whole breaths to pass naturally (It will only take a few seconds, but it will set the tone for the day ahead).

• WEEK TWO I want to listen and really hear what my loved one is saying – I mirror back to him/her to check what has been said and that I understand.

• WEEK THREE I want to keep communication open by validating what has been said – that there is logic to what he/she has said and that it makes sense.

• WEEK FOUR I want to have better dialogue by expressing compassion - by putting myself in the others’ shoes and seeing it through their perspective to have empathy. 

This blog post is dedicated to all those who make my life more wonderful – thank you for your love and support especially in a challenging time!

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My services include the Complete Study Course

The Complete Study Course is provided to students at school or university level. We follow a Mindfulness Approach – learning how to study, and we form good habits.

The Course is meant to give you or your children practical insight on how to learn more effectively and with less frustration (like beating procrastination). The lessons in this course can help in learning many different subjects and skills. Whether you love language or math, music or physics or history, you will have a lot of fun, and learn a LOT about how to study!

Contact Details

Lucia Brand
082 782 4747
luciabrand@cybersmart.co.za

The 2016-adventure

The 2016-adventure continues...

Thank you for joining this adventure (If you have not done so yet, it is not too late to start).
Welcome to a journey on how to break habits. Let us stop operating on autopilot and start living a life of joy and curiosity!

There are many reasons why you would want to 'wake up'. Feel free to share the reason(s) and comment(s) about your journey by clicking on 'No comments:' below. You may influence the flow of this adventure and it may be to your benefit!

I will introduce the new experiments for the following 4 weeks:

• WEEK ONE I want to meditate for 10 minutes every morning for at least a week.

• WEEK TWO I want to let my mind wander, for 5 minutes, or for an afternoon or a weekend.

• WEEK THREE I want at least one fun activity per day.

• WEEK FOUR I want to wear a different piece of jewellery each day, like a watch, ankle bracelet or rings (even on my toes!).

You might like some of our experiments, like the 10-minute meditation (click, to see an animation) and want to incorporate it into your life or another new productive habit. You might want to form a good study habit or change something that doesn't work.

If so, here are some guidelines to help you form a new good habit:

Do the new action at the same time of the day (and possibly, at the same location). Take note that some days it might be easier than on other days, very much like surfing or swimming on a wave in the ocean. So stay with the ups and downs, without judgment.

1. Your cue to do the activity (to study for example) needs a bit of willpower to follow through. Your reaction to it is what counts, like starting a study session immediately (setting a timer and focusing) and resisting the urge to procrastinate by asking, for instance, "Do I need to check my WhatsApp messages now?".
2. Make your routine uninterrupted 25-minute focused work sessions, with 5-minute breaks.
3. Reward yourself by for example having a cup of tea or watering your pot plants.
4. A belief that you ARE capable of doing what needs to be done is vital. What other beliefs might be holding you back?


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I provide a Complete Study Course to students and/or learners. We follow a Mindfulness Approach learning how to study and we form good study habits.

The Course is meant to give you or your children practical insight on how to learn more effectively and with less frustration. The lessons in this course can help in learning many different subjects and skills. Whether you love language or math, music or physics or history, you will have a lot of fun, and learn a LOT about how to study!

Contact Details
082 782 4747
luciabrand@cybersmart.co.za

Your wake-up call for 2016

I invite you to join me for a year of adventure, where we stop operating on autopilot and start living a life of curiosity and joy.

Baie van ons voel ontevrede met ons lewe waarin ons slapend wakker is. Dit sluit dié van ons in wat maar voortbeur tot dié wat ten alle koste 'n poging aanwend om mense/dinge te beheer sodat die lewe glad verloop.

This year I am delighted to create a 10-month long experiment to break our routines! I will introduce the experiments one month at a time. Our first month’s experiments look like this:

• WEEK ONE I will use the HALT-technique:  pausing in stressful moments to check in and gauge whether I am Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired. If I am, I'll find a solution first (for myself and/or my kids!) before responding.

• WEEK TWO I will spend the first 10 minutes of every day outside.

• WEEK THREE I will take a cold(er) shower each day.

• WEEK FOUR I will tell one person per day what I love about them.

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"Reculer pour mieux sauter" – take a step back in order to leap higher!

According to statistics, most of us will fail our New Year’s resolutions. We’ll probably beat ourselves up for being lazy and undisciplined. But, with few exceptions, our New Year’s resolutions don’t fail because of laziness.

Hoekom wil ons nie verander nie?

Ons het kompeterende behoeftes en belangstellings. Terwyl een deel van ons doelstellings het vir persoonlike groei, het ’n ander deel vrae. Dit verg bewuswording!

This year, instead of being hard on ourselves, maybe we can have a little mindfulness and compassion for ourselves. Maybe we can embrace the part of us that wants to change and the part of us that is afraid to change. Maybe then, even our failed resolutions will be the beginning of something new and good and beautiful.

The French have a lovely expression that encapsulates the importance of calling on patience and restraint when we feel out of kilter, rather than bulldozing on. 


Join us in a 10-month long experiment to take a step back in order to leap higher! And tell us why you want to 'wake up" in 2016.

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The Complete Study Course follows a Mindfulness Approach.


It is meant to give you or your children practical insight on how to learn more effectively and with less frustration. The lessons in this course can help in learning many different subjects and skills. Whether you love language or math, music or physics or history, you will have a lot of fun, and learn a LOT about how to learn!

Contact Details
082 782 4747
luciabrand@cybersmart.co.za