The characteristics of Mindfulness

Healing and growth happen through the following attitudes of Mindfulness:

One of the reasons that mindfulness is really catching on is that it can be delivered in a way that is stripped of any religious connotations, making it entirely acceptable to the wider population.

When you want something you can become fixated upon it. Whenyou don’t like what is unfolding or when you resist it, you simply push itaway. 

 ‘Letting go’ is the opposite of both, and it is allowing things to be as they are. Noticing and noting thoughts and feelings are crucial elements of awareness. This is your choice to break the loop of adding stress to the situation. The body gets at ease and the mind gets clearer and happier when practising awareness. This provides the ideal environment for change to happen.

Realise when you are being distracted by a thought, emotion or sensation. Step back from fuelling it with more stressful thoughts.  Witness and label the sensation, feeling or thought in the moment, e.g. ‘I’m aware of... a thought/feeling/pain’ in the moment and be present again. To release it, you must take notice of it. Releasing it is almost like flushing it out through your body. (You may also release it with laughter with your friends.)

You will probably be shocked to see how many times in your day you get lost in a distraction or resist it. Non-judgemental paying attention is a key factor in this regard. You wake up to recognise the judging – just let it ‘rain down’ in this moment... instead of it having to be one way or another.

It isn’t about thinking about change or looking for change, but allowing change to happen in spite of uncertainty that we experience.

Keeping this moment light and playful (and your laughter is yet again so helpful in this regard) and being curious about what is about to unfold opens up space in the mind and helps you not be caught up in your thoughts and emotions. Forcing things to happen prevents change. When thoughts or feelings are unsettling you might want it to be different; by resisting it, you hold things in place and don’t allow life to flow; instead you want to provide the conditions for change to happen. If you are not anticipating or expecting what to come next, you are able to rest in the uncertainty of one moment unfolding at a time and the ‘not knowing’. You have to step back and not control it. ‘Non-striving’ means just being with what is, because it is sufficient.

To have both doing and not-doing (just being) is necessary in order to be productive with your ‘do to list’.

Acknowledge that change has its own pace and time. Be kind with yourself and patient with the situation... and cultivate trust, also in your body’s wisdom.

It is helpful to notice small changes in our life. Physical sensations in your body constantly change. When you follow your sensations, you see this! You realise that a pain here or there has a lifespan of its own. It is there now, but later it is gone. This makes it possible for you not to identify so strongly with your beliefs about it (what you think or feel aren’t equal to who you are). This makes the mind so much lighter.

It is so easy to notice the beginning of an unpleasant emotion, but rarely do you notice the end! Your perspective on life is likely to be less distorted when you also acknowledge the end of difficult emotions. You take note of moments of happiness or calmness, as well. Nothing is fixed forever and you realise that you are not one kind of person like, “I am an anxious person” or “I am an unhappy person”. We tend to limit ourselves as well as others in that way that we tend to think one-dimensionally. We tend to label ourselves and mostly in a negative way. Or we get involved in our thoughts and become it. It can be liberating to become aware that you are not stuck in a certain way – now you feel different than before. You realise that you have both pleasant and unpleasant emotions. You want to allow a range of possibilities and the freedom to change.

The messiness of everyday life, like being in conflict with someone becomes the teacher of the moment. In order to respond differently than before, you don’t attach to how it ‘should be’ or ‘doing it my way’. Instead, see what it is you are resisting now, put it in words, and release it to move closer to acceptance.

You allow/create the space to see more than your previous beliefs – to administer this moment becomes effortless and it is all you need to make a difference.

If you are breathing, there is more right than wrong with you. When you take that into account, you are able to bring gratitude for being alive into the moment.

There is more freedom in your mind to embrace emotions without getting lost in them and room to give yourself over to life in the moment. If you think of all the good people and the good things in your life, you can imagine them as islands in a rough ocean (If that is what your life seems like at this moment?). These are spaces or sanctuaries for you to replenish your energy and nourish yourself. You are able to ENJOY your life and also to give other people what would make them happy. This generosity celebrates our interconnectedness.

Naomi Shihab Nye writes, “Then it is only kindness that makes sense anymore / only kindness that ties your shoes / and sends you out into the day to gaze at bread, / only kindness that raises its head / from the crowd of the world to say / It is I you have been looking for, / and then goes with you everywhere / like a shadow or a friend. One of the reasons that mindfulness is really catching on is that it can be delivered in a way that is stripped of any religious connotations, making it entirely acceptable to the wider population.